


Salvation

by DanaFox1013



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Alien Invasion, Aliens, Colonization, Episode: s07e21 Je Souhaite, Gen, If you only read one work by me, Minor Character Death, Multi, Mytharc, Not Really Character Death, Original Character(s), Temporary Character Death
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-02
Updated: 2015-11-02
Packaged: 2018-04-29 14:29:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5131037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DanaFox1013/pseuds/DanaFox1013
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is an edited and re-written version of a fic originally posted to ff.net under the name "Dana's Choice".</p><p>...</p><p>"I have so much fight left in me, Mulder. These men that have done this to me. To Penny Northern, to Betsy Hagopian, to who knows how many other women. They have to be stopped, and I want to be the one who does it."</p><p>"At what cost?" Mulder asked her quietly. Scully seemed to think about it for a while.</p><p>"At any cost.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Landscape is Changing

It started on a Sunday morning.

Mulder had awoken early and made breakfast for himself and Scully who was still asleep in his bed. He had been thinking about Jen, the jinniyah he had released the previous day, and about happy endings. He had found himself wondering whether a happy ending could be possible for himself and Scully after all. 

Scully awoke and joined him, and the two had begun to eat in near silence, only a few words shared about their separate plans for the day. He remembered the exact words she had been uttering, about going to the mall to buy a birthday present for her nephew, when his stomach dropped.

“Mulder, what is it?” she had asked him, reacting to his ashen-faced stare. His hand moved involuntarily beneath his nose and she unconsciously copied the action, moving her hand away again to see it stained bright red with blood.

...

Some time later, Mulder knocked twice on Scully's door before letting himself into her hospital room. She looked up from her bed and gave him a weak smile. Her face was pale, her features faint. From Mulder’s perspective, she had quite literally faded away over the past few months and the speed at which that change had occurred scared him more than any X-File. He smiled back at her, trying to keep the fear he felt from showing on his face. 

Mulder and Maggie had just finished speaking with Scully’s doctor and the prognosis had not been as positive as they had hoped. The experimental treatment Scully had been receiving as a last resort against her cancer had so far shown no effect, and now there was nothing else left to try except to hope for a miracle. Maggie had stepped outside, unable to face her daughter for a few moments until she had composed herself.

"Hey gorgeous," Mulder said, smiling at Scully, knowing she was reading every minute detail of his expression.

"No need to lie.”

"You'll always be gorgeous to me," he told her firmly, trying to think how to break the news.

"It's OK," she said before he had an opportunity, "I already know that the treatment didn’t take. I'd be able to feel if it had. It's OK."

"No, it's not," Mulder snapped back, instantly regretting his tone. "It will never be OK. I'll find a cure Scully, I did it before and God help me I'll do it again. I'll..."

"Mulder, please, stop. I never expected you to cure me. You've already done so much more than any other person could have. I’ve made my peace; now I just want to enjoy the time I have left with you. I can't do that if you're out there trying to find an impossible cure."

“But it’s…”

“Mulder, I need you to promise me something.”

“Anything.”

“Promise me you won’t go looking.”

Mulder tried to find an argument but a glance at Scully’s face, resolute even in the face of her own death, stopped him in his tracks. Instead he closed his eyes and tried to let the acceptance wash over him. If Scully was going to be taken away from him, he was going to make their remaining time together as special as possible.

“I promise.”


	2. If...

Weeks passed and Mulder had done his best to live up to his promise. It hadn’t been easy and he found himself falling down more than a few online rabbit holes, pursuing rumours and chasing miracles. But whenever the path had become too murky, he pulled back and forced himself to walk away. 

Today he moved through the hospital corridors, barely acknowledging the faces that had grown so familiar over recent months. He arrived at Scully's door, knocked once and opened it without waiting for a response. A doctor he didn't recognise was at Scully's bedside, leaning close and talking in an undertone. The doctor appeared young and attractive. In Mulder's overly critical mind, he was far too young to have enough training or experience to be looking after his partner, and his subconscious immediately groused that he looked more like Hollywood’s idea of a doctor rather than the real deal. As soon as the doctor spotted Mulder, he silenced himself and stood up.

"Mr Mulder?" he asked, extending his hand. Mulder returned the gesture and nodded curtly. "I'm Dr Carlisle, my apologies, I was just leaving."

The doctor turned back to Scully who had become so pale in the previous days that she almost blended in with the off white hospital sheets. 

"You'll think about what I said?"

Scully nodded. She looked deep in thought and Mulder thought he detected a hint of fear in her eyes. The doctor smiled and Mulder noted his glaringly perfect teeth as he exited the room. Mulder walked around the bed and sat down in the chair the doctor had just vacated.

"Hey, what was that about?" he asked, taking her hand in his own and indicating where the doctor had just left with his other. Scully was quiet for a moment.

"Do you trust me?" she asked.

"What? Yes, of course I trust you, Scully." Mulder replied, thoroughly confused. "Why would you even ask me that?"

"Dr Carlisle thinks that there might be an avenue of treatment we haven't explored yet."

Mulder tensed.

"Scully, no. Remember our rule, we don't deal with doctors that the Gunmen haven't run background checks on. You remember what happened last time with Dr Scanlon don't you?"

"Look at me!" she laughed quietly, "Do you think that matters anymore? I've got days, Mulder, and that's the best-case scenario."   
Mulder recoiled slightly as her words hit him.

"Don't say things like that.”

"You know it's true.”

"What is this new treatment?" he asked, his brow furrowing in concern as Scully looked away.

"I can't tell you, that's why you have to trust me."

"What?” Mulder stood up so forcefully his chair nearly tipped backwards and he began stalking around the room. “Why the hell not? Jesus, Scully you can trust me, can't you? After everything we've been through together."

"It's not my choice Mulder. I'd tell you if I could, surely you know that?" Mulder stopped moving and stared at her.

"You think it could work?"

"Yes, I think so," she seemed hesitant, "but there are side effects."

"What kind of side effects?" 

"I can't tell you that either."

He considered this for a moment.

"We’re talking about something permanent?"

"Yes. Life-altering."

"You're scaring me Scully."

"I'm scaring myself."

Mulder walked back to the bed and pulled his chair as close as his legs would allow, taking both her hands in his.

"Then don't do it."

She squeezed his hands and Mulder was shocked at how weak she suddenly seemed.

"You think I can just turn away from something that could allow me to carry on when it’s being handed to me on a silver platter?” she asked him. “Something that would allow me to continue to work against the evil we've seen in the world? Could even give me an advantage over it?" She froze, seemingly having said too much. 

Mulder stared at her, unable to find the words he needed.

"I have so much fight left in me, Mulder. These men that have done this to me. To Penny Northern, to Betsy Hagopian, to who knows how many other women. They have to be stopped, and I want to be the one who does it."

"At what cost?" Mulder asked her quietly. Scully seemed to think about it for a while.

"At any cost.”


	3. When You Come Back I Won't Be Here

Mulder sat on the blue plastic chair in the hospital corridor. 

Beside him Maggie was trembling, silent sobs racking her body. He desperately wanted to reach out and comfort her but he didn't know how. His own fears about the unidentified procedure that his partner had opted to try rendered him nearly paralysed. 

Inside Scully's hospital room, painfully aware of the silent vigil taking place only a few feet away, Dr Carlisle bent down beside his patient and took a deep breath to calm his own jagged nerves before he began. The procedure had not been authorised by the hospital. In fact, nobody except Mulder, Scully, Maggie, and himself even knew it was happening. Dr .Carlisle had assured Mulder and Maggie that it would not interfere with any of the other treatments Scully was receiving, but both he and Dana had requested that it take place in private, behind closed doors.

An alarm sounded and Mulder realised in one heart-stopping moment that it was coming from Scully's room. He leapt to his feet just as the door swung open and Dr Carlisle appeared.

"She's gone into shock, we're losing her," he said, not managing another word before Mulder and Maggie shot past him and into the room. Scully was still lying on her bed, her eyes closed, looking exactly as she had when Mulder had walked out five minutes ago, except now she was entirely unresponsive. Lights were blinking furiously all around and several different buzzing noises were sounding from the various machines near the bed.

"What the hell have you done to her?" Mulder demanded, rounding on the doctor.

"Nothing! We hadn't even started," Dr Carlisle replied as half a dozen nurses and the attending physician descended on the room, surrounding Scully and blocking her from Mulder's view. Mulder gave the doctor one last sceptical look before turning back and squeezing in beside Maggie who had grabbed hold of her daughter's hand and was speaking frantically.

"Don't you dare die on me Dana, you hear me? You keep fighting, you're my fighter, don't you dare give up now!" 

Mulder felt the world slow down around him as the medical staff fought desperately to keep Scully alive.

"What's happening?" a senior nurse demanded.

"I can't tell," the attending barked back at her, "her entire body has gone into severe shock, the heartbeat is erratic and weakening. I can't find a cause but she's dying."

Mulder spun around to look for Dr Carlisle but the place where he had stood was empty. He took a few steps toward the door, thinking for a few moments about running out of the room to find him but he didn't dare risk leaving the room. Instead he only stared at the door and cursed Scully's decision not to have the Gunmen check up on this mysterious new doctor.

As he stood staring, Mulder became aware that he must have been standing there for quite some time. He noticed the nurses on the far side of the bed stepping away and turned to see the attending close her eyes and exhale heavily.

"Time of death 17:14. Attending physician Dr Luci Steiv." She turned to Maggie with a practised expression across her face, "I'm sorry for your loss.”

Mulder stepped forward just in time to help a male nurse catch Maggie as she collapsed, feeling his own knees try to give way as well. He looked up at the attending, feeling the hot sting of tears in his eyes as his chest constricted and his muscles began to shake.

"Please, you have to keep trying, there must be something more you can do?" Maggie was pleading.

"I'm sorry, there's no brain activity and she has been in asystole for several minutes now, she's gone," the attending replied with the caring yet detached manner of someone who had delivered similar speeches too many times.

Mulder couldn't process what he was hearing. He stood up, leaving Maggie sobbing into the arms of the nurse and stared at Scully. 

She couldn't be dead, it was impossible. 

He reached forward and took hold of her hand. She still felt warm and soft, not like the dead he had dealt with for so many years. He held the back of a trembling hand over her nose and mouth but felt no air wash over it, placed fingers on her neck but felt no pulse. The monitors continued to drone in the background of his mind, their sirens long since shut off. He simply stared at her face, trying to remember every last line, every minuscule pore, every strand of hair and the exact way the light bounced from it. He had only just begun to see her true beauty. The only benefit of his unsolicited brain surgery was when he had awoken to a world filled with shocking new colours, reds and greens distinguishable to his eyes for the first time. He had been mesmerised by Scully's hair that day, finally able to see the fiery beauty that had been shielded from him for so many years. Now he stared at it again, trying to remember the exact shade of every strand. Eventually, he felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to see the attending who had pronounced the woman he loved more than anything in the world dead, standing before him.

"Take all the time you need," she said softly, obviously accustomed to this kind of speech "when you're ready, one of the nurses will take her, she'll be well cared for."

Mulder nodded dumbly; then immediately fled the room without warning, unable to look back as he knew he would never be able to turn away from her again knowing that it would be the last time he would see her face.

He walked down the corridor without thinking, without a destination in his mind, he just walked. He wondered vaguely where Maggie was now, had she still been in the room when he left? Was she still on the floor, or hunched over her daughter's body, unable to tear herself away and accept that her family had once again been torn apart and she was now without any daughters at all? Images of Scully's brothers flashed briefly before his eyes. Bill was stuck out at sea: exact location classified. He had been trying in vain to be granted emergency shore leave since Scully's condition had deteriorated but had been denied due to his seniority, he had been needed urgently on board ship. Charlie was somewhere in mid-flight, due to land in DC within the hour. No one had expected this sudden change, Mulder hoped he didn't have to be the one to break the news to him. How do you tell a man that his sister is dead when you can't bring yourself to believe it's true? 

Mulder stopped and realised he had arrived at a waiting area near Scully's hospital room, he must have walked a circuit around the entire building. He sat down and stared at the wall opposite, listening to the canned laughter emitting from a TV in the nurses' station. Shortly, he became aware of someone standing next to him and looked up to see the attending from Scully's room.

"Mr Mulder?" she asked. Mulder nodded silently. "The nurse found this in Dana's hand, her mother believes it is for you."

The attending handed Mulder a piece of paper. On it, in his partner's handwriting, was a note.

_"Trust me."_


End file.
